Posts Tagged ‘Braaaiiinnnsss’

Volunteering Tips for the Zombie Apocalypse

Monday, October 31st, 2011

They’re coming.

The shuffling, mindless creep towards the inevitable end of everything we know and love.

Zombies.

What’s the best way to deal with the impending zombie apocalypse?

Start recruiting volunteers to help you rebuild society. It might sound a bit strange to start thinking about rebuilding after the zombie apocalypse before it’s happened, but you always start recruiting volunteers before you need them. Besides, we know not to start recruiting volunteers on the day of our projects, why would recruiting for the zombie apocalypse be any different?

Get ready for the inevitable rise of the living dead. Being prepared is the most important part of any emergency, and different emergencies require different kinds of preparedness. there are some basic steps that you want to follow for all emergencies, though. Make sure that you have a plan in place and everyone in your family knows what to do when the zombies finally come.

When the zombies come, it’s all about efficiency. Remember, it’s not about what everyone else is doing, it’s about what works best for you. Don’t focus on the preferred or cool way to get the job done. Focus on getting things done. Partnering with big companies might seem like the best way to stay alive when the zombies come, but building strong partnerships with your neighbors is important, too. They’re not as flashy, but smaller organizations are more adaptable, which makes survival easier. Zombies hate that!

Braaaiiinnnsss. Once the zombie apocalypse starts to wind down, the survivors are going to need to start rebuilding society. You’ll need all kinds of volunteers to help rebuild, and volunteers with specific skills will be helpful in restoring society to it’s pre-zombie splendor. You’ll want to recruit skills-based volunteers, because the very things that the living dead feed upon will help to rebuild society. Yes, skills-based volunteers keep all of their knowledge in their braaaiiinnnsss.

The Double Tap. Not only effective in making sure a zombie goes down and stays down (they’re good fakers, zombies), the double tap can be used in just about every aspect of working with volunteers. Whether it’s making the ask for volunteers, orienting volunteers, training volunteers, or thanking them for a job well done, always take the time to do it twice.
Although, in the case of zombies it’s important to hit them twice quickly, the volunteer double tap should be spaced out. You don’t want to ask someone to volunteer twice within the first minute of meeting them, even if hitting the zombie twice with your crowbar is a good idea. Spread out the time between your asks, orientations, and trainings. Things might be busy for people, what with all of the running from zombies, and they might not be able to volunteer when you first ask them. Ask again later, and you just might find yourself a new volunteer.


A little bit of thanks goes a long way. Lets not kid ourselves. When the zombies come, there’s going to be yelling and screaming and panicking, but if you’re prepared you can really reduce the amount of insanity that will come with the zombies. You’ll have your crew of volunteers around you, ready to rebuild when the world comes to its senses. Don’t forget to say thank you to your volunteers while things are crazy, and after society is rebuilt. There are many ways to say thank you, so don’t be stingy.


Have you had to survive a zombie apocalypse and rebuild society? Let us know how you did it in the comments!

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Posted in Cultural Differences, Just for Fun, Volunteering | 1 Comment »